Well I guess even the most talented directors have to botch a project or two on occasion. It's unfortunate, because if there was one film that seemed like a sure fire recipe for success, it was this one. A cast led by Javier Bardem and Natalie Portman, produced by one of the men behind "The English Patient", and directed by Milos Forman, director of "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" and "Amadeus"(both of which he won Oscars for), not to mention that it's about a real person, "Goya's Ghosts" seemed like it would be right up the Academy's alley. Unfortunately, the script (co-written by Forman and some other guy) is a complete misfire. Set in the late 1700's, the film tells the story of famed Spanish painter Francisco Goya(a strangely cast Stellan Skarsgard)....sort of. It's hard to tell if Goya is supposed to be the movie's focus, or just a plot device designed to give the film a sense of.......reality?...relevance?....whatever. Anyway, young aristocrat Ines (Portman) is one of Goya's favorite models right around the time that the oh-so-corrupt Spanish Inquisition is beginning to suspect Goya of being a blasphemer. After a silly mixup, Ines is imprisoned on the charge of being a practicing Jew. She is sent to the Holy Office where she cracks under pressure and confesses to the false charge, landing her a ticket to hell on earth. Meanwhile, Brother (or Father...they call him both..) Lorenzo(Bardem) is having his portrait painted by Goya, who he has an amicable relationship with. Ines' parents (closer friends with Goya) worry about their daughter and ask if he can find a way to get her out quickly. On, and on the side, Lorenzo and Ines kinda sorta become.....lovers....friends with benefits.....yeah that sounds about right. Unfortunately after a little dinner party, Lorenzo finds himself humiliated and abandons the Church. Oh, and Goya's also painting a portrait for his other close (and very powerful) friend the queen of Spain, but even that isn't going so well. That's when Napoleon's forces burst on the scene. I hate to inform you (if you managed to survive reading that without falling into a confusion-induced coma) that I'm not doing a bad job of summarizing the movie; that's pretty much the best I can do with this gigantic misfire. However, messy story telling aside, the film's biggest crime is that it simply doesn't know what to be. Another period piece, the above mentioned "Amadeus", managed to capture a time period with both authentic seriousness and authentic humor, both of which were balanced to near perfection. Unfortunately the same does not hold true here; the dramatic and the humorous are often blended in unflattering scenarios that make it difficult to decide whether the film is supposed to be a dark comedy or a full on spoof. Making matters worse are the script's contrived attempts at "important" dialogue; there are a number of occasions where it feels like certain scenes were written just so that the writers could squeeze in these "awards-bait" gems, the most memorable of which goes something like this:
High Inquisitor (or something like that): You must confess.
Ines: Confess what? [she is hung from the ceiling with her arms tied behind her back...it looks like it hurts]
High Inquisitor: Confess the truth.
Ines: TELL ME WHAT THE TRUTH ISSSSSSSS!!!!
However, there are some positives. The film does manage to hold one's interest, as sloppily written as it is, and it is informative about the conditions of Spain at the time. The production values are top notch and, much like Julie Taymor's vastly superior "Frida", many scenes look as though they could have been painted by Goya himself. However, these small good things are heavily outweighed; Bardem and Portman do solid work, but the lack of consistent languages and accents is annoying and distracting (everyone speaks English, but people whispering to each other in the background do so in Spanish). The score is another mistake, in that it flips between being overly jolly so as to almost sound satirical, to being so bombastic that it risks turning the whole show into a soap opera of sorts. A classic case of great talent gone to waste.
Grade: C-
Nominations: none
Number of 2007 films seen: 65
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